You have not known what you are.
You have slumbered upon yourself all your life.
Your eyes have been as much as closed most of the time.
What you have done is already in mockeries.

The mockeries are not you.
Underneath them
And within them,
I see you lurk...

-Walt Whitman



I LOVE YOU and I will love you, because my heart says so, because I still can. I will never think. Not tonight. Not ever. The current still flows in the same direction. To you. There is no point going back, no sense in evasion. This is my home now. You might say this is pointless, a shout to the void. But maybe you’re my black hole. Maybe this is what it truly means to be foolish, or to truly love someone, which would mean I have no choice. I just love. You probably don’t want it but you have no choice either. However, this is still the best option. To let my heart hang out there, beats faint in the wind, flailing, exposed to the elements. To feel pain until my seams burst, my cracks giving way. Maybe that’s what I need. To actually break and pick myself up from the floor with my bare hands, in the hope of finding answers, acceptance waiting underneath the broken pieces. So tonight, I will love you until the next second, the next phase of the moon, the next parallel universe. Because my heart says so. Because I still can. My heart is still full.

1 comment:

Yas Jayson said...

You have perfectly blended the tragic and the beautiful in this short prose. How direct, how straight forward can someone be after knowing loneliness and gladness.