You have not known what you are.
You have slumbered upon yourself all your life.
Your eyes have been as much as closed most of the time.
What you have done is already in mockeries.

The mockeries are not you.
Underneath them
And within them,
I see you lurk...


-Walt Whitman


11.2.09

tell me, tell me not


O
UR LIPS TRAP silent unspoken words

A gathering darkness in a faint heart

Harboring shadows of doubt and of hurt

Like arrows drawn deep in the wings of birds

Hidden letters underneath our tongues

Are saliva that unrest fermented

Scared words that invokes air polluted

Brewing disguised love, stuck in our lungs

Silence turns into airless cramped spaces

Suffocating our last hope for our love

Taunted by vultures hovering above

Ready to eat our flesh once we fall breathless

Spaces become impenetrable walls

Fortified fear, horrid indecision

For us to go astray, lose direction

And watch as our patch of heaven falls

Walls turn into raw hurts invisible

Drawing permanent lines that tear my soul

But longing persists, an immortal call

To utter these words inconceivable



---

HOW CAN YOU SAY that you love someone with only mere words? How could love be expressed and be reduced it into three words alone that undermine the majesty of love itself? Saying the words is an easy task but how can we trust these words when we ourselves cannot trust our hearts?

We should say what we mean, and act what we say. A person should be cautious of how he chooses to translate his love into words or actions because no one knows who might believe him. We do not want to break hearts, do we? But what if what we say turn out to be mere lies? Should we blame ourselves? Should we consider ourselves traitors for speaking the language of our hearts that we thought was true and absolute? Or should we just reason out what we feel using pure logic?

Love is a risk and it is your choice whether you will risk or not. And when you decide to utter the words, make sure you’re falling. For love is like cutting the same a rope in which you hold on to. Once it’s cut, there’s no turning back. If you fall hard, good for you. If you’re hurt really bad, grieve and cry but don’t let the pain consume you. You may suffer from some fractured bones but make sure you still have bones left so you could still walk. There would be instances where you would carry your own severed arm or foot home for you to stitch back unto your amputated limbs. You might look stupid for doing this but it doesn’t necessarily mean that you are. If you cut the rope and you’re not falling, don’t bother cutting the rope again. If you do, that is stupidity. You might be standing on the ground all along. Don’t fool yourself. You are not in love.

And weighing all these things, should we choose to be silent? People say following the heart would be the best choice and the most clichéd answer. But for those who no longer trust their hearts, a road of unrest awaits them—a dark path teeming with questions towards an end barren of answers.



36 comments:

bena said...

i couldn't wait you compile all these entries you have here and make an inspiring coffee-table book out of it.. galing mo talagang magsulat ron.. great job! =)

ZARA 札拉 [사랑해~] said...

sometimes heart will lie as well..

I'm afraid to listen to it anymore...

jonathan said...

Bloghopping here and I have to say I am inspired by the way you write your thoughts. The flow is indeed smooth and very refreshing. You have a talent.

Mugen said...

And for those who no longer wish to trust their hearts, let them pass the trappings of romance to others. Perhaps at the end of one's suffering the bridge he built for two other people to find each other will be the same bridge that would connect him to the person he seeks.

gravity said...

woah! as always, very very well written. i almost gasped for air reading the poetry part. i felt the struggle of telling exactly how you feel when words aren't just enough.

true.. i remember the very sentimental song by the corrs tuloy. don't say you love me. =)

lucas said...

bena: coffee table book? that's a really cool idea. but who would want to read depressing articles over coffee? hahaha! thanks :)

zara: me too :(

jonathan: thanks for the compliments, jonathan :)

mugen: i don't exactly know how to react to this...nagdugo na kasi ilong ko bigla. hehe :P but i guess you're right :) thanks, joms.

lucas said...

gravity: thanks, gravity for your comment.

i love the corrs btw. my brother and i are certified fanatics. hehehe!

Elay said...

thoughtless words leave lasting wounds. -Rick Warren

madjik said...

"How could love be expressed and be reduced it into three words alone that undermine the majesty of love itself?"

--liked those lines hehehe..

youre a goosebump factory lucas..

KRIS JASPER said...

Love is truly risky. Im glad I took the risk 6 years ago. lol!

And your poetry.... I hope your talent will be acknowledged by more people soon.

Chyng said...

Good point!
How can that strong feeling be translated into 3 words?

Sa palagay ko, only say the 1-4-3 word pag halos sumabog na yung dibdib mo sa sobrang pagmamahal. (hehe korni!)

RJ said...

Napakagandang advice naman nito, Ron.

eliment said...

hi ron,
you're really cool writer. i like the way you write your thoughts.

as what somebody says, love is like a gamble...minsan talo, minsan panalo.

Denis said...

sometimes, yung hindi masabi yun ang pinaka importante - it could break you or make you.

nakakapanghina naman to... sapol eeeeh haha

Lance said...

me too i don't trust my heart anymore... it could be selfish sometimes, and i hate it...

ORACLE said...

wow!... yun lang. =)

.pOot! said...

kuya ron, visit my site @ tsilspat.blogspot.com

ARTERY said...

Actions speak louder than words pa rin. Ganda ng header, plus the snowflakes. It reminds me na malamig ang valentine ko. Feeling ko Christmas ngayon. joke lang. Goodluck pare.

lucas said...

elay: cold words are far more lancinating, indeed.

madjik: natawa naman ako! hehe! literal kasi pagkakatranslate ko! haha!

KJ: so 6 years na kayo? cool!

chyng: siguro lagi ka ng napapa1-4-3 kay mr. everything mo noh? hhehe!

RJ: thanks, RJ :)

eli: mas talo kapag hindi ka tumaya :P

denis: bakit nga ganun noh? yung mga importanteng sa mga importanteng bagay pa tayo nagkakaron ng hesitation...

sapul na naman? tsk tsk tsk! hehehe :P

lance: it's curious how we could love and yet have the tendency to be selfish. love is selfless right?

Oracle: thanks :) may manghuhulang naligaw sa blog ko cool! :)

poot: sige try ko.

artery: kelangan laging pasko sa puso natin! wahahahaha! wala ng mas cocorny dyan! hahaha! thanks :P

gravity said...

"don't say you love me" is like one of the saddest songs ever, especially the intro part na violin lang. wala lang, walang konek =)

eli said...

tama ka dun! kaya taya lang ng taya! darating din ang time na makakajackpot!

lucas said...

gravity: yeah! the unplugged version ba yung sinasabi mo? astig nga yun... what i love about them is most of them are girls and yet they could play their instruments well :)

eli: hehe! nakajackpot ka na ba? :P

eliment said...

ron, noon akala ko mega jackpot na. pero nung umalis, parang lumabo yong jackpot. parang dumating yong time na isip ko kng maiclaim ko pa kaya ang jackpot ko?

gentle said...

say what you mean and mean what you say. i agree. otherwise, you'll just end up fooling yourself. a veryh timely post, ron. happy balentyms!

PUSANG-gala said...

but how can we trust these words when we ourselves cannot trust our hearts? ----wow---lalim---

pero tama ka Ron.

One more thing---cguro we cannot love another person unless we learn how to love ourselves---wag lang sobra ha.

meaning---a lot of fail in love because we don't even know love ourselves---para yun rin sinabi u. keke

kalansaycollector said...

sino ba ang nagsasalita?
utak? puso? puson?

makinig tayong mabuti. sino ang nagsisinungaling? sino ang nagsasabi ng totoo?

love is a choice.

Pao Pielago said...

i don't just utter "i love you" easily. heck...i don't even say that phrase to my parents. i say something else. for me, there is a level of dignity and sacredness to the phrase that you only say it to that very special person in your life. and there is an art to saying it that a few can only master. :)

Ely said...

Happy Valentines!!! hehe

MAY said...

and my favorite writer strikes again *wink *wink

Love is a risk and it is your choice whether you will risk or not

Totally agree... I think it is the nature of the heart to act according to its will, kaya lang minsan matigas ang ulo, hindi nakikinig sa puso... hehehe

Anyway, as always, I enjoyed reading your masterpiece again... :) kudos! :)

flamindevil said...

yeah.it's easy to say these three words but it's hard to prove.sadly, sometimes love is an excuse for people to get laid.

vanvan said...

uu nga...i agree with this people..
sana, me aklat nah..

amazing..

yeah..

Lionheart : Richard the Adventurer said...

Nice naman talaga idol!

Pasensya na kung hindi agad ako nakadalaw... Busy ako last week...

Anyway....

Kapag mahal mo ang isang tao, kailangan ipakita mo rin... Hehe :)

lucas said...

eli: hays...i'm sorry to hear that. definitely debunks the maxim 'absence make the heart go fonder"

gentle: i totally agree :) belated happy valentines day.

antonio: i couldn't agree more. we have to feel good about ourselves first before we could feel good about the relationships we're in.

kalansay collector: yeah...love is a gamble...pero minsan sa sobrang sakit we tend to become cynical,skeptics.

pao: sounds like you have mastered the art of telling the phrase. thanks for the comment.

ely: belated balemtimes din, mate!

may: ganun ako eh.. i don't trust anymore. at this moment being more logical makes sense.

salamat ha. :)

flamindevil: wow... love is an excuse for people to get laid. totally agree. it's just plain lust that's working if that's the case

van van: thanks :)

richard: i agree. words don't mean anything unless you prove them :)

it's ok. peace out!

Anonymous said...

it's a shame..isn't it..ilu..di naman totoo..

love this line...
If you cut the rope and you’re not falling, don’t bother cutting the rope again. If you do, that is stupidity. You might be standing on the ground all along. Don’t fool yourself. You are not in love.

amazing how we define what love is...universal..

cheers mate..

lucas said...

anonymous: yeah... and yet i think we will always be mystified by it.

thanks for dropping :)

leslie said...

i passed by this one...i initially intended to read your older posts...and i must say, you are the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. you make me yield for my old self...when i barely knew anything about emotions and expressing them.now that i know better, i'm nursing an aching heart.not because it's out of love, but because it's full of it :D